More than forty years have passed since that evening and from time to time it comes back to me. It is quite possible that I have managed to suppress the full impact of that night; it is also highly probable that for many years it affected my sexual desires and actions. The memory of holding the naked torso of an adult male can creep up on me when I least expect it. For example, when I have recognised the vulnerability of my own children, wondering how a ‘caring’ adult can take advantage of an innocent child. Sometimes it comes to me during or after a sexual encounter. I have never raised this issue in counselling, nor have I contacted the Verona Fathers to discuss the trauma this issue has caused me. I have instead chosen to block it from my mind and tried not to think of it.
Only Father Romano Nardo will know what actually happened that night.
All that remains is the memory that I never went back to his room or the God Squad and I lost my respect for him.