Self Harming

During the first term at Mirfield I just lived for the free day. As far as I remember, this took place during the middle of the term, and on a Saturday. Instead of spending the morning doing cleaning and housework, we were able to have ‘ free time’ from after morning mass until the evening service. On my first such day, I planned to get the train from Huddersfield to Liverpool and then spend time with my mum and dad in Liverpool City Centre. I could not wait, that Saturday could not come soon enough.

Because of my homesickness my studies during this period suffered, and I struggled in all aspects of the school curriculum.

I went through a period of self harming and became quite bald as a result of it. I would gently pull clumps of my hair out, put them together and then slowly stick them in my ear to give me a tickling effect. I would do this at various times of the day. However, I seem to remember that I did this, more often than not, during classroom lessons and during chapel services.

What I find incredible now, is that nobody at that time noticed what I was going through and how homesick and unhappy I was, and consequently how I was suffering mentally because of it. It was a very difficult and lonely time for me and I was pleased when Nardo arrived at Mirfield – he was attentive to me, and that took away the pain that accompanied my homesickness.

2 responses to “Self Harming

  1. I finally have the courage to say, I was abused by the bastards and suffer to this day. At 45 years of age tonight and 4500 miles away I cried and cried and cried in 2011 about what those bastards did to me in 1978. I hope someone is still alive from the priesthood, here is an open invitation – call me in the USA on 00 1 863 232 9337 and have the courage to explain why you continue to dance with your devil and cover up the sexual, emotional, physical and spiritual abuse you Verona Fathers crushed by soul with.

    Better to confess to me that may forgive than to your God who will surely punish you all!


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