A powerful video.  It shows  a ‘strong and big man’

Mark Murray

Pope Francis has recently appointed Bishop Scicluna to work on addressing clerical abuse in the Catholic Church – http://www.ibtimes.com/who-bishop-charles-scicluna-pope-appoints-former-sex-crimes-prosecutor-lead-new-panel-1790168

Bishop Scicluna was also involved in similar work when Pope Ratzinger was in place.

I telephoned Bishop Scicluna in Malta last year. Bishop Scicluna informed me that he would be meeting Pope Francis the following week and he would raise, not only my situation, but also the situation of a number of my fellow seminarians that were also abused at the Comboni Fathers junior seminary in Mirfield in the 1960’s and 1970’s.

I also arranged a telephone meeting with him when he was sent to Scotland last year to investigate the clerical abuse that took place there. That meeting/conversation with me never took place – no excuses, no apologies – I was just kept waiting and hoping.

Kevin and I are still waiting for a reply to his – Kevin’s – letter, which I have copied below.

The correct email address was used – it was, in fact, the same email address that the Bishop had been using when he emailed me.

Dear Bishop Scicluna
My name is Kevin Deignan I was a seminarian at Mirfield with Mark Murray . I understand that Mark has been in contact with you to seek help in achieving some kind of closure for himself after the abuse he endured at the hands of Romano Nardo , and the mental abuse he is still suffering through the inaction of the order.
Prior to Mark’s disclosure to me 3yrs ago I considered my time at the seminary to be a totally positive one. I believed that the small community of priests who were entrusted with our care and wellbeing were amongst the most principled people I had ever met . After Mark’s revelation other people came forward and for me the illusion was shattered. Not one of these principled men could , for whatever reason , do the right thing .
As a naïve 11yr old boy I could not see , nor understand ,what was happening. I let a good friend down. As a 58yr old,worldly wise man, I will not let him down. I am trying to give Mark and his family as much support as they need to get through these difficult times. To this end I decided to contact you.
My main concern is that if nothing positive comes from his contact with you this will have a crushing effect on him. Mark has battled on in isolation for over 15yrs exploring all options to reach the closure he needs and deserves . Mark’s efforts have been thwarted by the order at every turn . Token gestures have been made to try and placate Mark while protecting the order and giving sanctuary to the abuser . The order’s actions ,or rather their inactions have forced Mark to look for a legal assistance .
I can only think that the order’s reluctance to meet Mark’s requests was due to fear of litigation but through their inaction they have brought about the thing they feared, Mark seeks closure not financial gain .
In all honesty I can say that I have had little faith in the church in matters of abuse within it’s ranks . There has been a lack of transparency and a reluctance for independent investigation . I am no longer a practising catholic . I was amazed by the fact that Mark and his family , until recently, were practising catholics . However on reflection this is not so strange as Mark was very devout as a young seminarian . I believe that it was this devout side of Mark , as well as several other young men , that Fr Nardo exploited. Nardo would often refer to passages from the bible to justify his action. The washing of Peter’s feet by Jesus would give him justification for intimate contact . The words ” suffer little children who come unto me ” would take on a completely different meaning .
I believe that you can bring pressure to bear that will ultimately give Mark the closure ,and his family the peace they deserve. The question is “ do I believe this will happen ? “ in truth the answer is no. Pope Francis is giving me hope ,a principled man. Can he guide the church to make the changes that will bring the disillusioned back to the fold ?
Mark hopes that something will come of this contact , but I would ask , no empty promises , honesty and fairness is all Mark asks for.

Your’s faithfully Kevin Deignan

Father Enrique Sanchez and Father David Glenday.

I would like to talk with you – you would not want to talk with me, I am sure of that.  However, it is you, the representatives of the Comboni Missionaries, that should be offering the hand of reconciliation and pleading for forgiveness and not me.

I sometimes  think how I would talk with – and how he would listen and how he would respond  – to Father Peter Zuani, my Comboni Missionary Novice Master. I believe his response would have beeen totally different to yours.  Father Peter  was one of the most spiritual and holy men that I had ever been  blessed with knowing.

There were many times – as so many of you must know – that I spent talking and praying with Father Peter about my vocation to the religious life. And there were times when I was on the cusp of telling him I had no vocation. There were times when I wanted to – was desperate inside to – tell him about the sexual abuse that Nardo had done to me. And yet, as a missionary Comboni Brother I was  being sent to the very country that my abuser had been living in since 1970.  I was living a lie, and I was too frightened to tell anyone or  do anything about it.

I believed – irrationally –  that because I had been sexually abused by  the Comboni Missionary, Father Romano Nardo, I too,  would go on and become an abuser of children. The fear that accompanied me when I thought about it, directed me in becoming a Comboni Brother.   I too, just like Nardo was, would be kept safe and protected when,  and if,  I started abusing children.

It is probably now to late for talking, at least to me.

The abuse inquiry has begun. Today it is Day One for Judge, Lowell Goddard.  It will be a  Statutory Inquiry.

Mark Murray

The WordPress.com stats helper monkeys prepared a 2014 annual report for this blog.

Here’s an excerpt:

The concert hall at the Sydney Opera House holds 2,700 people. This blog was viewed about 29,000 times in 2014. If it were a concert at Sydney Opera House, it would take about 11 sold-out performances for that many people to see it.

Click here to see the complete report.

Father Robert Hicks Disembowels Puppy Dog

In regards to the “Hanging of the Dog” this was not the only time that the Reverend Father Robert Hicks had been involved in killing a dog..

In another case, Father Robert Hicks was involved, allegedly, in killing a puppy, that belonged to another Mirfield Priest.

It seems, that Father Robert Hicks used the puppy to vent his anger at a group of boys, who let us say, were not fully behind the IRA, and what they believed in.

The group of boys in question, tended to have an allegiance to, and support for, the British Government in relation to Northern Ireland and the war that was taking place there.

Bloody Sunday for Puppy Dog

It was a day after the Bloody Sunday Massacres and Hicks wanted to make a point. He took a group of Brits, supportive lads, to the farm barn and in front of them hung the dog – a puppy dog – when it was still alive, he disembowelled the puppy in front of the lads.

Some of the lads were sick, some urinated in their pants out of shock and some ran away.

Remember these lads were only twelve and thirteen years old.

I know personally that this action by the very Reverent Father Hicks has had a deep and lasting effect on at least one of the lads that witnessed it.

Mark Murray

Editor’s Note:- We were not sure about publishing this story. However, it has now been corroborated by two other people.

By Boy X who has written anonymously for us before.

Comboni Missionaries Sexual Abuse

Firstly, I would just like to thank you gerambo for your wishes to me in what you posted on 27th Dec. I must admit that what you said regarding closing down part of my personalty, is something I had never heard of before.

I have been thinking a lot about it since. Initially i felt a bit uncomfortable about the idea, I don’t really know why,

Maybe fear of my memories, or fear of the memories I have still to remember. I know they’re there because lately I have remembered some things.

Mostly about my feelings, my feelings when certain things happened. Frightening feelings. Feelings that became worse as time went by.

Even after the sexual abuse stopped, things got worse. Maybe I was gone in my mind by then. The memories that frighten me the most are memories about my last year in Mirfield.

I know I was a mess and, thinking back, it surprises me now that I wasn’t asked to leave during that time and not told by letter to my parents during the Summer.

Clerical Abuse by Comboni Missionaries

It was in my first year there that they started on me and by the time I reached my last year there, i was living a nightmare and clinging in desperation to my friends.

I sometimes wonder what my friends thought of me. I never told any of them what was going on. I was too ashamed to do that.

I still feel shame and that’s the main reason I’ve always writen anonymously. I think I may have eventually said who I am but I wrote about what I was doing in London.

How do I tell my friends I did that?

I can’t. I wish I had never writen it.

Expelled from Mirfield by Comboni Missionaries

The strange thing is, if that letter hadn’t come,saying I shouldn’t return, I think I would have returned. I can’t say I really understand that .

I’m not sure if it was after my first year or after my second year, when the summer holiday were ending and I was due to go back, I told my parents that I didn’t want to go back.

I think it must have been the day before I was suppose to go back that I told them. Anyway, when the day came, I didn’t go. Sometime during that day, I changed my mind, I can’t remember why.

Returning to Mirfield

So my mother phoned Mirfield and made some excuse and she was told I could return a day late, so that’s what I did.

I’ve always been aware of what happened regarding the abuse but maybe it’s all the pain and confusion in my mind because of it that I buried things within me.

I don’t know. Hopefully I will find out.

Psychological Help

Although I haven’t been given a date yet, I am going to be seeing a psycholgist, perhaps things will change. One thing that has helped me a lot is talking with Mark over the phone and writing down everything I do remember.

I decided to do that after I first had something posted on the blog. Nearly all what I’ve writen is just for myself. Trying to get some order in my mind.

Bishop Ceresoli

I’ve been trying to figure out what was going on with me concerning Father Ceresoli while I was at Mirfield. I’ve been looking through the blog to see if anyone else had any particular problem with him. I found two mentions, one refering to Fr. Ceresoli as a psychopath and another refering to him by the writer as one of the most evil people he has ever met.

I can think of a few reasons why he might have affected me so much,so much so that I have always looked on Ceresoli as some sort of monster.

I remember that it was quite a long time before Ceresoli had any effect on me, maybe because while in the juniors, I had relatively little to do with him or he with me.

Sexually Abused by Fr. Pinkman

Perhaps by the time I had been sexually abused so many times I was probably too weak, too vulnerable to be able to cope with his vile evil ways.

Perhaps if the sexual abuse had never happened, I would have been able to cope with him, maybe not.

Maybe his cold uncaring attitude to me might not have impacted on me too much. Maybe it would.

I know that emotional abuse can destroy your mind , destroy your life just like any abuse can.

But then I think, and I’ve said it before, Ceresoli knew I was having problems, so wasn’t that the time for him to show some concern – at least to ask me what was wrong?

Not that I would have told him, but he never even asked. All I got was ridicule. Does it take special training for an adult to know when a kid is hurting? Maybe a psychopath doesn’t see the hurt, or if seeing the hurt, doesn’t care.

Give Me the Boy

Then another notion pops into my head, perhaps it’s something I saw on the blog, I can’t remember, but perhaps not. The system itself. Changing the saying slightly, ‘ Give me a boy for a few years and I’ll show you the man’.

Treat a kid with harshness, and if he survives, the desired outcome may be achieved, an automaton. Is that what Ceresoli is? Is that what they all are?

To hell with those who don’t survive but say a prayer for them anyway?

But who knows? I don’t. I’m just speculating,just beginning. I know I’m still all over the place with my thinking but I want to understand what happened to me.

I need to understand. Whatever it takes, I’m determined to do that.

Read Boy X’s Story by Clicking on My Last Goodbye

Comboni Missionaries Other Names

They are known in English-speaking countries as the Comboni MIssionaries (ex-Verona Fathers), in Italy as Missionari Comboniani, in Spanish-speaking countries as Misioneros Combonianos, in German-speaking countries as Comboni-Missionare and in Portuguese-speaking countries as Missionarios Combonianos.

The Comboni Missionaries, will, at some time,  have to enter into an honest and meaningful dialogue with men who were abused, as children, at Mirfield. It is difficult to find a word that can describe  the Comboni Missionaries in relation to their lack of any truthful response to the Mirfield Blog  and   to the abuse that took place at Mirfield.

The only  response that I am aware of   is from Father Robert Hicks.

Father Robert Hicks  was visited,  in Sunnigdale,  last year,   by a man that was abused as a child at Mirfield.  Father Robert Hicks used the well known hand sign of rubbing his thumb and forfinger together as a means  of  indicating that all we –  that is, those that were sexually abused at Mirfield  – were concerned  with,  was money.

How sad. Find words to describe it –  It is difficult.

Mark Murray

Comboni Missionaries

Listening to those that were abused or  listening to lawyers advice and then ignoring the abused – what is the most important.

If you where a holy man, a man that cared about humanity and the suffering,  what would be most important to you.

Where is the offer of pastoral and spiritual care from the Comboni Missionaries towards those that were abused by their priests.

This is on a high agenda in Pope Francis’s Vatican.

Mark